Serotonia
by Shorthairedbabe
Summary: "We are all born to die—the difference is the intensity with which we choose to live."
1. Chapter 1

She was a sweet girl he first saw her. There had been a mass casualty caused by hollows. While others were running away, she was running towards the danger to get the injured out from the streets. The woman was beautiful, short hair up in a ponytail and strands falling against her face as she pulls the injured behind a car and into safety. She had her head on a swivel as she checked for a pulse and started chest compressions. He watched her for a second longer before going back to killing hollows, per Ikkaku's complaints.

As he finished cleaning up the mess, he went back to watching the girl as she worked on loading people into ambulances. She was precise and organized giving orders to the EMTs as they showed up. She was in street clothes, but you could tell that she was a great healer with the care and love that she gave her patients as they were loaded up.

The second time he spotted her, it was dark out and she was walking home from what he thinks was work. Her blue and purple scrubs made her stand out against the street lights and little shops that were starting to close down. He was walking down the street by himself in his gigai, staying with Urahara was a problem from time to time for him. All the yelling and calling him a mooch was getting on his nerves.

She was looking down at her phone before she sighed and put it in her pocket to continue on her walk. She carried herself with pride and confidence, her head up and shoulders back. She spotted Renji and formed a small smile at him as she passed. She was amazingly cute, with the way her eyes crinkled with she smiled at him and the bounce in her step as she left him in confusion and amazement.

The third time he saw her, he was at a club in the Human World on his day off with some of his friends. Ikkaku wanted to get shit faced in the human world and not worry about work the next day, and Yumichika was reluctant but came along to keep him in line. Rangiku came along as well, and she was caught flirting with the boys at the bar, getting free drinks from them all.

Renji sighed and sipped his sake at the bar and ignored how ridiculous his friends were being. He felt a hand on his shoulder and he looked over to see the girl. He blue eyes shining in the yellow bar lights, her makeup was complimentary her lips, oh God her lips, slightly glossy and plump.

She waved down the bartender and smiled when she was noticed. "Can I get a whiskey on the rocks, please?" She was polite and her voice was like velvet. He was still focused on her lips as she pulled out cash to pay the bartender for her drink. She thanked him, and left to go back to her friends.

Renji's gaze followed her as she swayed in her tight jeans and cute sheer blouse, she still carried herself with confidence and pride like she did the last time he saw her and it was still amazing to him. He couldn't help but stare at her and he could tell he was starting to feel warm from the alcohol that he was drinking.

She sat down with her friend, or maybe her coworkers who cares, he wanted to talk to her. But he was too scared to do it. He usually gets rejected whenever he tried back in the Seireitei, and it hurt his ego.

"Dude you're staring at her hard." Ikkaku slurred as he downed his shots, "Just go talk to her, maybe you would get laid." Renji sputters at him before he grumbles at him.

"What do I even do, let alone say?" Ikkaku looked at him and raised a brow.

"You go up, and you ask her to dance. The music is great to grind up on girl." Renji groaned at him and finished off his sake.

"Fine, but is this fails, you're paying for my drinks." Ikkaku waved him off and ordered another round of shots for himself. He hesitated on leaving his seat. He didn't even know how to dance and it's been way too long since he did anything like this, what was he supposed to do!?

Ikkaku pushed him out of his chair and smirked, "If you don't go and try I will." Renji grumbled loudly so Ikkaku could hear him before slightly stomping away awkwardly.

He walked weaved himself through the crowds of people and towards the dance floor, trying his best not to touch too many people and get stuck in a large groups. He looked around to the tables that she was at before until he caught her dancing on the wood floor with some of her friends, laughing and a little wobbly.

Maybe he should have drank more alcohol.

He continued to weave his way into the crowd and when he was a few feet away from her, he started to retreat. God, he was pathetic, couldn't even dance with a–

Someone caught his hand and pulled him closer to them, or more like clumsily yanked him towards them. Soft and small hand squeezed his as he turned to see what grabbed his hand.

"You can't just come over and not be expected to dance!" she pulled on him once more, leading him to the middle of the dance floor. He smiled awkwardly, and she laughed a little, "If we need to, we can get you more alcohol." She yanked him hard close to her body and he stood still just looking at her. Her eyes were on him and, god those pretty blue eyes had a little bit of hazel in them. They felt so warm and inviting just like she was. _Fuck it_ , he thought and leaned down to place a small kiss on her lips.

She hummed and started to grind and sway on him slowly till his picked up on the hint. He completely let go of his thoughts and went with the flow. His hands quickly found her hips as hers tugged on his hair and gripped his shirt.

This went on for hours as his worries and thoughts melted away because of her. His hand glided over her warm skin as his head started to spin a little from either euphoria or the little alcohol he had but who knows all he was thinking about was the woman that was so close to him. All he could focus on was her...

He never actually got her name…

That thought broke his focus as he opened his eyes to look at her. Her lips were slightly parted and he could slight hear her humming to the song that was playing. She was sweating a little bit, but what did he expect, they _were_ in the middle of a large crowd.

He leaned his head down into the crook of her neck and sighed, "I never got your name." that pulled her out of her daze. She laughed.

"Is that important?"

"It can be."

"Mayumi." She tugged on his hair, "What about your name?"

"Renji."

"Well," she pulled back a little so she could look him in the eyes, "It's getting pretty late, how about we get out of here?"

"And go where?"

Mayumi just smiles.

* * *

The light shone through the window slats adjacent from the bed, and it hit him perfectly in the eyes. He thought he could ignore it but it ended up waking him up from his deep sleep. He grumbled and tried to turn to his side but it didn't help at all. He flipped to his stomach and still had a hard time getting comfortable again.

Renji finally opened his eyes and looked around.

This wasn't his home.

Where the hell was he?

He sat up fast and looked at his surroundings. A queen sized bed shoved into the corner of the small room and a night stand right next to it. His clothes were folded nicely on top of the dresser that sat across from the closet.

Where was he?

"Are you up yet?" was that –

Mayumi walked into the room, dressed in full scrubs and trying to put her hair up. "Cool, I got called in for an emergency and –"

"Need me to go huh?" she gave a sympathetic smile.

"Sorry, Renji. I made some coffee and there are some leftover pancakes and eggs from my breakfast if you're hungry. You're clothes are on the dresser and I leave in thirty minutes." He hums. She made some food and left enough for him. How sweet.

"So uh…" he wasn't sure what to say. Last night was great, no doubt but really. He wasn't sure if he wanted to keep it at a one night stand or...

He pressed the heel of his palms into his eyes and groaned before throwing the blanket off of him. She was standing by the mirror that hung by the closet door, trying to put away the crazy strands of hair on the side of her face. He couldn't help but stare at her, how graceful she was just trying to tuck a few stray hairs away.

"I hate to be rude, but hurry up or you're gonna make me late." He straightened up and got out of bed. Trying his best to quickly get dressed, "Your shoes are by the door."

"So uh… I see you out on the street –?"

"You'll see me out on the street then. This shouldn't be something that is awkward, people do it all the time." she shrugged. "Nothing wrong being proud of your activities." She looked over to him and gave him a grin. "There's still food with your name on it, go eat before I have to boot you to the street."

She went back to trying to fix her hair as he walked out of the small room and into the living room and kitchen.

Her apartment was sizeable and very homey. The smell of pancakes and fresh coffee still linger in the air. She must make pretty good money with an apartment like this. The living room was extremely neutral. Three large book stands full of books, both medical and young adult fiction with a few language books and some other oddities. A small couch sat across from a TV and a dinky sliding glass door right next to the couch. She definitely tried to make the best out of her little Tokyo apartment.

He shuffled towards the kitchen, seeing everything all laid out perfectly for him. The plate had two pancakes on it, with a side of scrambled eggs and a hot cup of coffee next to it on the counter. A fork called his name as he realized how hungry he was just by the sight of the food.

He started to shovel food down his throat right as Mayumi walked out of the room. Her name tag rattled on her hip; Mayumi Takashi, right under a picture of her.

"So, you're a nurse?"

"I'm a glorified nurse, really." She chuckled, "I'm a nurse practitioner. So like a doctor with better bed side manners."

"A friend of mine is a doctor." Ichigo. It had been a long time since he has seen him. Maybe he should pay him a visit sometime soon.

"It's a great job, I love the people I work with." She rummaged around trying to find her keys as he finished up his food and coffee.

"So, were extremely sober and it kinda feels appropriate to ask if you'd want to do this again." She popped up from behind the counter with a confused face.

"Which part, the sex or just seeing each other?"

"We can do whatever you're comfortable with." God, that sinking feeling in his stomach was coming back. He looked around for a pen and paper. "I can write down my contact info before I leave, and if you _really_ want to talk to me again, you can."

"What happened to the 'I'm the boss' attitude from last night?" she teased and his face turned red. "I'll do you one better. I work at the biggest hospital in Tokyo as an ER nurse. I try to take my breaks on time and I usually take them in the coffee shop on the main floor." She handed him a pen and pad of paper. "Write down your number, and maybe I'll shoot you a text." He gave her a genuine smile. The sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach was starting to go away.

"I'd like that."

* * *

 **It has been such a long time since I wrote anything for fanfiction or just Bleach. Writing this just felt so cringy and I am sorry if it felt like that but first chapters are always the hardest for me. I try my best to find music that inspires me, but I always end up listening to one song on repeat. Next chapter, I might create a list or soundtrack depending for my girl and this story, but let me know what I should do in the long run and if one thing will be easier then another.**

 **I am always open to constructive criticism and and thoughts on literally anything (spelling errors, grammar errors, structure errors, reassurance, ect.). I have a huge plan for this story and my character and I always feel bad for making an OC story but I'll try not to give her too much.**

 **If you've come this far I want to thank you for reading! You don't have to review but it's appreciated or you can private message me as well! I'll try my best to come out with chapters regularly depending on how this takes off.**

 **Thanks again!**

 **-Red**


	2. Chapter 2

Mayumi sat in the café for her break, sipping the fourth coffee of the morning and reading something on her phone. She still hasn't had the chance to text Renji, too many patients coming in and out of the ER, she needed to focus. She didn't know why she was hesitating so badly to text back a guy who was just at her place a few hours ago. Her stomach did flips from what happened last night. It had been so long since she had gotten action like that, especially something that great.

"Where did you go last night!?" she looked up at the woman walking over to her in her pretty, tight fitting pencil skirt that seemed to be a size too small for the woman's hips. "You grinded on a dude all night and then you leave! You were our DD, Yumi." She whined.

"Fukumi, please, keep your voice down!" Mayumi scolded with furrowed brows, "Yes I left is that a bad thing?"

"No, but that made us have to get a cab."

"You're a lawyer, you can afford a cab in Tokyo." Mayumi grumbled into her cup of coffee, really wishing her pager would go off right now.

"He was cute."

"Hmm?"

"The guy you left with, tall with tattoos. So handsome." Mayumi snorts.

"I feel like you want me to tell you what happened last night too."

"YES! Tell me EVERYTHING!" her pager buzzed, finally.

"Maybe next time." Mayumi chuckled and picked up her pager as Fukumi whined at her before she started to drink her tea and scroll through her phone. Mayumi shook her head and threw away her drink before heading back to the ER.

She thought about sending him a text, but would that be awkward? He was meant to be a one night stand, but he was handsome and –

"No, focus, you're at work…" she muttered to herself as she shoved her phone back into her pocket.

It was about to be a long day.

* * *

She said she worked at the largest hospital in Tokyo.

She wasn't kidding about that one.

He looked down at his watch and wondered if she was still on her break. Maybe not, she does work in the ER. He kind of knows how busy something like that gets from the last time he was in Squad 4, especially after the war.

He didn't want to think about that right now. So many years of peace left him with simple jobs and no excitement and this girl gave him that back, or at least he thinks so.

"Renji? What are you doing here?" he looked over to see none other than carrot top himself.

He looked snazzy, all up in a two piece suit with a bag in one hand and his pea coat in the other. Renji stuttered, what was he supposed to say? He's here to see a girl he was with last night?

 _That's too much, don't say that…_ he thought to himself.

"I thought I would go explore the city. I only ever see the city from up high, I thought coming down to ground would be a good idea." Ichigo raised a brow.

"I guess I can't say that's a bad idea." He shrugged and smiled. "Why don't you come with me, I'll show you around, yeah? Rukia should be coming in soon to say hi as well." Renji made a face, and he didn't know if it was confusion, shock or surprise. Why was Rukia coming over?

"Isn't she on a mission?"

"She is, but I think she finished early so she's gonna come over." He shrugged. Renji didn't think that they were still trying to do that long distance thing. Can they really call it long distance if it's between two different realms?

Renji hums at him, keeping a note in his mind to talk to Rukia about it later.

"So, are you really here to explore the city or is it for something else." Renji stood ridged. He knew he was bad at lying but, he can't be _that_ bad. "If you've hurt yourself I can treat you at the clinic you know. I've got no problem with that." Renji visibly relaxed and Ichigo seemed to have caught on.

"Why are you –?"

"Dr. Kurosaki! Can you come here and give me an opinion on a patie –?" Mayumi looked up from her clipboard to see Renji talking to Ichigo. Renji's face went a little red as he wondered; what are the odds of her and Ichigo working together. "He's not allowed back here unless he's family of a patient." She was eyeing him for a moment before looking at Ichigo. "Patient has a history of heart problems, but his symptoms don't correlate with anything to do with heart problems." She handed him the clip board as she watched Renji.

"Well, his EKG looks fine but let's order an MRI scan to see what's going on with him, yeah?" she nods and takes back her clipboard.

Renji lets go a sigh he didn't know he was holding.

"She was eyeing you hard." Ichigo looks at him with a condescending smirk on his face, "Is there something you're not telling me?"

"Shut up." Ichigo urged him to follow him to his office so he could drop things off.

"I'm gonna assume she's the reason you're here." Renji grumbled, "You're not exactly a closed book, Renji. This isn't the first time I've seen right through you when it comes to secrets."

"Okay, yeah, fine I was here to see her." He felt embarrassed and like his pride was just knocked down a few. Ichigo smirked at him.

"I can't wait to tell Rukia."

"NO!"

Ichigo laughed.

* * *

Lunch time was the best, after five hours of working on crazy to sick people, she needed a damn break.

She walked her way towards a table in the café and slumped into the chair with a loud sigh and groan. Oh her feet hurt, and her back, and legs, and everything else really.

She sunk deep into her chair and took a deep breath to relax herself. A thirty minute lunch would be enough to regain her strength. Hopefully…

"Long day?" she opened her eyes and saw Renji.

"I feel like you're stalking me." She teased and he sputtered.

"You're the one who gave me the description of the hospital!" she laughed softly, catching his attention. Her chest slowly moved up and down, trying to calm herself down in order to have a decent conversation. "If I'm bother you, I can leave."

"What? No! You're not bothering me. I'm just tired. The place is starting to fill up fast, I guess there was an accident on the highway."

"Any casualties?"

"There were a few that were dead on impact, but some of them died in my ER." She hummed before rubbing her face and groaning. "I've never seen anything like it. Some of the EMTs showed me a picture of the accident." She sat up and looked at him. "It looked like a monster had slashed the cars. Something with big claws."

Renji straightened himself out. A hollow. Or at least he thinks so, "Monsters aren't real, Mayumi."

Her stomach fluttered, and that was a first. "I know, but… if you saw the pictures you'd think exactly what I was thinking."

"I guess so." He leaned against the circular table and looked at her. She looked exhausted, with bloodshot eyes and bags under them. She could totally use a break after work.

"What time do you get off?" he wasn't really following anything at this point, and he was ignoring the weird pit in his stomach. Every time he talked to her, it was there but it seemed like it was making its way out.

"Um… I think seven or eight. Why?"

"Let me take you out to dinner." This was so unlike him.

She looked at him with surprise before looking down at her hands, "I honestly thought this was gonna be a one night thing…" she mumbled, hoping he heard but also hoping he didn't.

He heard it though, because his face fell. She was pretty and all he wanted to do was take her out. Was that bad, did he do something wrong?

"We don't – don't have to go out or anything I –." He started to feel that weird sinking feeling in his stomach again. He started to look down at his hands, hoping that he wasn't making her feel trapped or embarrassed.

"I'm not saying _no_ …" she looked up, red in the face and twiddling her thumbs, "but it's not a _yes_." She looks at her watch and hopes that her timer will go off. "You know what, just let me think about it, okay? I mean –." She sighs and looks at him with confusion and uncertainty, "I really didn't expect you to come by my work…" she whispered before looking at her watch again. "Listen, I gotta go." She didn't really, "My lunch is about to end." It wasn't, she still had fifteen minutes but she felt stuck in a corner.

She rushed out of her chair and walked down the hallway and turned the corner before letting out the breath that she was holding. He meant no harm, she knew that, he wouldn't hurt her or anything but that situation was suffocating.

She walked her way back towards the ED, rubbing her face with her hands and thinking about what she can do about this situation. She didn't want to say no, but saying yes put her in a position that wasn't technically comfortable for her.

Her phone buzzed in her scrub pocket and she groans. Her head aches, but she still pulls out her phone and looks at the messages.

 _Ichigo: Find me when you're done with lunch._

She shoved her phone back into her pocket and walked down the hall watching her feet.

It was going to be a long damn day.

* * *

She was an hour over her shift, trying to fix some paperwork that someone didn't have time to finish and direct nurses and help them with their questions until the next person comes in. The man that covers the graveyard shift is always late, and she doesn't understand why. He has done this so many time to the point where it's fireable, and yet he still works here.

"Burning the midnight oil?" She looks up from her screen to see Ichigo ready to head home.

"I don't know where my night shift guy is. He's always late, but never _this_ late. I don't know I'm almost…" She scrunched her nose and hunched her shoulders, "Worried."

"He'll show up. Hopefully. If not, it's not like your nurses can't handle without him."

"I guess you're right…" She sighed, "Yeah, I'm gonna finished up these sheets and I'll head out."

"Why don't you come out with me and Rukia? Were gonna go out to this new American food restaurant that opened up. Some of her work buddies are coming with us, too."

"Text me the address and I'll meet you there, okay?"

"Deal, see you in a few." She sighed, thinking that going out two nights in a row was a bad idea but it'll be nice to just hang out after today.

She tried her best to focus on finishing up her papers but ended up giving up halfway through with tired bloodshot eyes. The halls were strangely quiet, thought she'll never say out loud. She didn't want to curse her nurses.

Maybe it would be okay if she left… She had worked for nine maybe ten hours, and she was off tomorrow, so why not.

And she still needed to the lockers and change.

She dropped her head onto the desk, creating a soft thud.

"Why did I agree to go out…"

Her phone buzzed in her pocket.

She whined.

* * *

 **I am so sorry this took me so long to upload. I finally finished up my midterms and found little blips of time between work and school. This chapter isn't my best, but filler is great for getting things started for me. And I like building up the world through little things like this.**

 **The next chapter might take me just as long to get out, but I am on a decent track when it comes to my ideas. Really though, I have a lot of things written out for this story.**

 **I'm also coming out with another story for -Man, so if you're into that manga, look out for it I've put a lot of effort into it.**

 **-Red**


	3. IMPORTANT PLEASE READ

I'm leaving for good but don't worry! You can find all of my stories and such on my AO3! It's under the same user name shorthairedbabe so come over and check it out!


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